Youthful Golden Years

Since I contracted Meningococcal Meningitis, I have a lot of medical problems that stem from the damage caused by the disease. This kind of comes along with being a survivor.The past several years my body has decided to torture me by having random numbness of parts of my body. These "flare ups", as Brock and call them, can last anywhere from a few days to weeks. During these times whatever part is having the issue at the time hurt. Imagine that feeling you get when your foot goes numb and it feels like a 1000 needles being stuck into randomly happening for days constantly. That is what these flare ups do. I cant sleep during these period. I can go several days on a couple hours of sleep. This becomes mentally, and physically exhausting.
After 3 years of dealing with this, Brock and I start the search for answers. Orthopedic surgeons, three different ortho doctors, did several exrays, MRI, Cat and EMGs. Their conclusion was that it was a autoimmune issue and I needed to go to a rhuemtologist. The rhuemtologist ran lots of blood work, 7 VERY large vials of blood was drawn which made for a very wobbly on stilts anemic Nikki, which gave no answers. So the rhuemtologist sent me to a new neurologist. The neurologist did a contrast and non contrast MRI of my brain and MORE blood work. The neurologist came back with deterioration of my entire nervous system. He said that the disease attack my nervous system so severally, which we knew already, that the long term damage is now starting to show up. The exciting part was we FINALLY got an answer! The devastating part is that he said it will only get worse from this point.
OK we have answers! WHOO HOOO! I am not crazy and my body DOES hate me! I am 34 years old and my body acts like it is in its seventies at times. This brings a whole new twist to a relationship.
People get married with the plan to grow old together, sit on the front porch together, and help each other during the "Golden Years." I feel like I am mentally younger that 34, but my body feels way older than 34. So the giggles and luaghs between a man and woman still are there between Brock and I. Our youthful fun relationship is still there. But he has to help me be mobile very often. Holding my hand not just for a sweetness but so I dont fall. Helping me up and down stairs. He pulls me off the floor when I cant get up. He pulls me from a laying to sitting position in bed so I can get up in the mornings sometimes.
Last night we were sitting on the couch watching TV and we started tickling each other, this happens often. I started squirming away from him and end up on my knees on the floor and start yelling because I did something to my already hurt hip. He helps me pop my hip back and rubs on it to relieve some of the pain. We laugh and joke about these time because he says he should claim Lemon law on me. LOL But in all actuality we are to young to have a relationship that has to to deal with Golden years problems. Brock takes it all with strides. He says "I would rather spend the time God has gave me with you then to not have you at all." Sweet yes! I am lucky, I know! I just wish we could enjoy our youthful relationship NOW and our golden years later.